What Do You Really Want?

What are you fighting for? What do you stand for? What are you moving toward?

I’m living in these questions these days. I am asking myself what I’m moving toward, rather than what I’m moving away from.  From a personal health perspective, I know that I’m moving away from a sense of stress and overachieving type-A-ness. But am I really trying to convert myself into a type-B personality? Is that even possible?

Part of Shadow Work is understanding that if you push away from one thing, you are likely to subconsciously draw it toward yourself.

I have to accept my type-A self, and try to figure out what it is I really want for myself in addition to that reality.  I want to move toward a sense of well-being. Toward a life where I spend time outside and walk a lot. Toward a life where I can practice and explore storytelling in written and perhaps even performance art.

This calibration change of the internal GPS is one that means I’m moving forward out of love, rather than running away from something out of fear, or pain.

“Get the Burger, Because the Hot Dog is Horrible”

Imagine you’re in a restaurant, and you ask the server what you should order. The server says “Get the burger.” You ask them why, looking at all of the options on the menu. “Because the hot dog is horrible.”

You might end up getting a soup and salad and avoid both the burger and the hot dog. The server did nothing to tell you why the burger was the best thing on the menu. They only primed you to avoid the hot dog.

This is my friend SH Butler‘s wonderful analogy for Liberal politics and statements these days. The Left is not spending any time explaining what’s great about their platform, they are spending all of their effort and energy saying why the conservative platform is wrong.

Don’t get me wrong, the hot dog may indeed be truly awful. But we’re not selling what we want to move toward. We’re only speaking and concentrating on what we want to move away from.

This goes back to my previous posts – Attention matters. How we pay attention, and what we pay attention to matters. You are giving those things your energy. What do you want to give your energy to?

Personally, as I live with this new diagnosis of psoriatic arthritis and wait for my meds to kick in sometime in the next 3-6 weeks, I’m very careful with my energy. I lavish attention on the things that feed me, and let everything else go, because I have to.

What’s So Great About the Burger?

“Get the burger – it’s thick and juicy, and you’ve never tasted anything like it.”

What am I moving toward?  Grad school. Writing. Storytelling. Healing.

What do I believe in? What am I fighting for? What do I want to move toward?

  • I believe that we need to make drastic steps to protect natural resources to ensure the world is a better place for our children
  • I believe wildlife diversity and natural spaces matter for the health and well-being of all of us
  • I believe that human beings, plants and animals have the right to clean water – since it’s one of those things we need to survive
  • I believe that human beings, bees, plants, and animals have the right to clean air – again, due to survival
  • I believe that the primary role of the federal government is one of safe, smart representation of all of the nation’s people in international affairs.
  • I believe that all people are equal – no exceptions.
  • I believe in the Maslow hierarchy of needs — and that meeting the basic needs of people is a responsible way to ensure that more people are reaching higher points of that hierarchy (self-actualization, eduction, etc)
  • I believe in evolution
  • I believe in the Divine – and in particular the Golden Rule
  • I believe deeply in my faith and the scientific method
  • I believe understanding other cultures, languages and ways of life make us better people
  • I believe that empathy is the only path for healing

These are the things I believe the most strongly. I’m on the fence about everything else. If the burger gets me equality for everyone, I’m in. Otherwise, I might order the salmon.

Comment, share, tell me. What are you FOR?



2 thoughts on “What Do You Really Want?

  1. I really have to echo much of your list at the end there, including what you’re moving towards. I’m back at Uni after 18 years to do an MA.
    – I believe in social welfare, that Government exists to serve all the people and protect the weakest. I do not need the Government’s help, but want to know they will be there should things go wrong.
    – I believe in community, in helping those around you, that change starts with you at a micro level.
    – I am a European more than a Briton and depressed at the last 12 months and will not allow small-minded petty nationalism to ruin that
    – I believe that many of the supposed ‘insults’ thrown by the right towards the left should be worn as a badge of honour
    – I believe that storytelling is a crucial tool in creating empathy and filling the void left by echo chambers.

    There’s a few for kick-off anyway 🙂

  2. Pingback: Inviting Change | Alicia K. Anderson

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